A – Z of Drinking List by Sid Gatt
The A-Z of Drinking List…
Sid Gatt’s take on the A-Z of Drinking:
A is for A*SHOLE – what I become after just a few drinks.(Some say I’m one even before I start drinking!)
B is for BENCH – if I can find one in the park, that’s where I’ll be sleeping tonight.
C is for CRAP – that’s how I feel next day after a heavy session the night before.
D is for DIRECTIONALLY Challenged – after a few drinks I don’t know my right from my left. (But I will find my way home eventually, it will be hard though!)
Let me know if you have any more A-Z Of Drinking one liners I can add to the list, in the comments box below…
Sid Gatt’s really is a sad git! A-Z of Drinking part 2: E to I
E is for EARTH, what I’ll be laid face down with at the end of the drinking session.
F is for FART – after a curry and a few beers I fart 6.9 on the rectum scale.
G is for GOD – who I think I am after a few drinks.(But most say OH MY GOD when they see me staggering about.) G is also for Getting Laid – there’s absolutely no chance when I’m drunk.
H is for HOT – what most woman over 30 stone look like after a few drinks. H is also for HUMBLE Pie – I have to go around apologizing to everyone next day for my rude antics the night before.
I is for IGNORANUS – some say(Well, most say…) I’m not only ignorant, but is also an asshole.
Sid Gatt – really is a sad git! A-Z of Drinking part 3: J to N
Sid Gatt’s take on the A-Z of Drinking – parts J – N
J is for JESUS – what most people say when they see me staggering around p*ssed as a fart. They also say JERK. J is also for JINGLE BOWELS – Gastrointestinal woes following a night of Christmas overindulgence.
K is for KOOL – something I never look. K is also for KICK ROCKS – when they tell me to leave, in the same sense of ‘f**k off’ or ‘get outta here’. And K is also for KNACKERED – what I’ll totally be tomorrow when I try to wake up.
L is for LOVE – I love everyone after a few beers. L is also for LUSH – what I become after I’m intoxicated after a just few drinks and flirts with everyone. L is also for LOST – what I’ll be when I fall out of the bar. L is also for LOOSER – I can’t spell loser!
M is for MINGER – what I am when I’m laid flat out on the bar room floor p*ssed in a pool of beer and vomit(And still have a silly grin on my face!). M is also for MORON – they also say that when they see me laid flat out.
N is for NEVER AGAIN – what I always say the next day about getting plastered, but forget the next time I go out for a drink.
A-Z of Drinking – part 4 – Letters O – S
Sid Gatt’s take on the A-Z of Drinking – parts O – S
O is for OBLIVION – I usually drink myself into it, unconsciousness, insensibility, a stupor, stupefaction, senselessness; a coma, a blackout.
P is for PR*CK – yet another name I’m called on a number occasions. P is also for PARTY – something I never get invited to.(Refer to previous one – that might be the answer why!?)
Q is for QUACK – usually the first person I see when coming out of an alcohol infused coma. Q is also for QUESTIONABLE Fart – the morning after when you fart and it leaves a serious question to oneself and others if a diarrhea squirt or follow-through (shart) has occurred.
R is for RETARDED – although everyone thinks I am, I can assure you it’s only the drink that makes me look that way. R is also for RDC – abbreviations for Really Don’t Care.
S is for SH*TFACED – what I am most nights of the year.
Your input on the A-Z of drinking appreciated…
Sid Gatt – really is a sad git! A-Z of Drinking part 5: T – X
T is for TONGUE TYPO - What happens whenI know perfectly well what I want to say but it comes out wrong. T is for TWIT – what people call me. (Actually the ‘I’ should be changed to an ‘A’!)
U is for UNDERAGE DRINKING – I started at 12. U is also for UGLY STICK – what I was hit with at birth!
V is for VODKA – a drink that makes you strong and clever.(Not!) V is also for VOMIT – what I do if I drink too much vodka!
W is for WASTED – what I’ll be getting tonight. Whether there’s a reason for it or not.
X is for XTREME DRINKING – when you’ve been drinking beers all night then hit the shorts.
Sid Gatt – really is a sad git! A-Z of Drinking part 6: Y and Z…
Y is for YOUTUBE – what I’ll be on if someone catches me on video staggering about aimlessly at the end of the night.(It’ll be so funny it’ll get millions of hits.) Y is also for YESSSSSSSS! when someone offers to buy you a drink.
Z is for ZZZZZZZZ! What I’ll be doing until mid afternoon after a really good drinking session the night before! Z is also for ZONED OUT – what you are before passing out – refer back to ZZZZZZZ. And finally Z is also for ZYXWVUTSRQPONMLKJIHGFEDCBA – The sound you make when you vomit alphabetti spaghetti!
